The lesson of a butterfly

Today I was looking into an old diary of mine and re-discovered this little story named  ‘the lesson  of a butterfly’.

One sunny day a man is sitting on a bench in a park.

He sits there staring at the soil and sees a cocoon.

Suddenly there is a movement and a tiny opening appears.

The man becomes interested and notices inside there is a butterfly struggling to open the cocoon.

Hour after hour passes by and all at once the movement stops. It seems like the butterfly is giving in. It seems like it cannot go on any longer.

The man decides to help the butterfly and opens up the cocoon some more.

Now the hole is large enough for the butterfly to come out. But it’s body is small and shriveled up; it’s wings rolled up.

The man keeps on looking as he expects the butterfly to become strong, to open up his wings and to support its body.

Nothing happens.

After a while the butterfly walks about, its body weak.  It does not take long and the movement stops; its life has gone.  

What the man with the best of his intentions did not realize was he stopped a natural process. The restriction of the cocoon and the fight of the butterfly were nature’s way of making sure liquid was pushed from the body to the wings. The butterfly needed the struggle to optimize its strength. It was nature’s way to activate the butterfly to become ready to fulfill its life to the fullest.

Like the butterfly we too need our own obstacles to test our strength.

We too need a chance to discover our possibilities to use our wings.

We too get opportunities to fly in victory.

Ten years have passed since I wrote in that diary. Looking back in time I can say life provided me with some obstacles and yes they did help me to become aware of my inner strength.

I do hope if obstacles come onto your path you decide to see them as opportunities too. Have a safe flight!

Commotion

In our world more and more commotion is going on to activate the heart consciousness of mankind.

People and situations are asking us to become alert, to find truth in our heart, to form opinions and to act accordingly. 

It is asking us as well  to do so with care as injuries can happen.

Emotions appear and happenings take place seemingly without reason,  invoking ‘why’ questions.

Many of us are and will be asked to use their knowledge and insights as they go through moments of darkness.

We are  asked  to cast off fear, doubt and limiting beliefs.  

We are asked us to find our inner voice and to speak out, to share hope, optimism and cooperation.

We are asked to shine our light.

For some this light may seem invisible or far away but please remember light is present always. For example when you sleep in the darkness of the night at the opposite side of the earth others are busy in the day.

Remember to stay courageous and to find the match to light your dark room.

Please open your lines of compassion and self strengthening.

Transcend you personal emotional pain and do what is needed and possible.

Let freedom win.

Time

Time is to be lived
Time is life
Living time
Endless

Friendship

To me friendship is a special form of relationship based on a mutual interest and respect.

I share many kinds of friendship at different levels of intimacy.  

With some friends I  go shopping, with  others  I go to clubs, concerts or theater.

I exchange thoughts and opinions.  I share laughter and good times.

With some of them I share ‘more’.

Some special friends I go to when in need of advice or a hug as they have the ability to give an opinion without condemning my thoughts or actions.  With them I hold  a relation that is based on mutual trust and holding open hearts and ears.  

It’s the kind of relation that has grown through time and took a lot of our investment.

For sure having that kind of friendship was and is not an easy thing to do. Because at moments  when I or they feel insecure or when in pain, our words and deeds can make the other feel like being under attack or abandoned.  

Such moments need the ability to be honest, it needs the dare to look at oneself and to admit the  ‘unpleasant’ thoughts and feelings we hold.  

At times in order for a friendship to continue we need to apologise and sometimes friendships come to an end.

Even at the end of a friendship the ability to being a friend can show by not betraying the trust which was there; by not speaking out badly nor revealing secrets shared.

Like Rollo May once said:

There is an energy field between humans. And, when we reach out in passion, it is met with an answering passion and changes the relationship forever.

HAPPINESS

I was asked: “how does one become happy, or what makes a person happy”.

I was asked to write down my opinion.

I noticed a smile on my face when reading the question.

About ‘Happiness’ many books are written, music and films made. Search for the word on the internet and you will find many opinions.

But you  questioner, you prefer my opinion.

Thank you for the question, thank you cause  you value my opinion and like to read it. This makes me happy.

To me 'to be happy' has many shapes en originates out of many situations.

To me 'to be happy' is an idea.

I decide myself when and if I am happy.

I decide what makes me happy, what I need to be happy and for how long I am happy.

It is my thought.

I can look around and compare myself to others. I can consider their opinion or how  they might think of me and value that to be the most important.

I can create the idea that I need this or that first like a ring, car, house, lots of money etc. and after obtaining  I will be happy.

I can create the idea that I need to be in a certain position first like holding a certain job or that I need to be married, or to be a mom or dad first. Or that I need to be alone or perhaps divorced before I am happy.

I can start thinking: oh too bad, poor me, now or in the future I cannot……., what will happen if………

In this way I undermine myself and create low self-esteem. I create emotions of gloom and sadness. Slowly but surely I set myself stuck.

I can make the choice to act on an other way.

I can start at the beginning and think: It is as it is. I am who I am, I’ve got what I’ve got, I do what I can and for all I am grateful.  At this moment it is sufficient and I am satisfied.

I do this daily.

In this way I value myself and notice feelings of joy and inner strength more and more. I empower myself. Slowly but surely I create energy and movement.

I decide what makes me happy.

I decide if I am happy.

How can we reduce an unhealthy stress level?

We can laugh :-)

Laughter boosts our immune system and lowers blood pressure.

Did you forget how to?

Watch and listen to: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NVoVmDHXjI4&feature=related

Call a humorous friend or rent a funny dvd.

We can sing out loud.

Let's pay attention to what we do.

Focus your attention on what you’re doing. This will keep your mind from drifting to more stressful thoughts. And is it something you do not like? Keep focussed to finish it quickly.

We can listen.

Listen to soothing music.

Listen to calming visualizations and meditations.

We can listen to our voice. Do you speak in a hurry? Reduce and talk more slowly.

Listen to your words. Do you use can’t, awful, loser, boring etc. a lot? Change and use more and more positive words.

We can take a bit more care of our inner and outer appearance.

We can wear clean clothes in bright colours or with bright accessories

We can have a regular haircut and a relaxing facial. (you can make your own)

We can walk, bike, exercise a bit daily (depending on wheater conditions we can do it in- or outdoors).

We can use less artificial sweets; eat and drink (more) fresh fruits, vegetables etc.